The Truth About Three

Over the past few months various people have asked how it really is having three kids. "Oh fine, a little crazy, but not that bad," has been our typical response. But the older Landon gets, the more I feel like I get it now. This is what they mean when they say three is a big transition. Landon isn't just a little baby who sleeps and eats anymore. He is all over the place, throws tantrums, needs attention and interaction (not that he didn't before, but he's not content to sit on my lap and chew on a toy anymore, he is busy.) I feel like I am constantly being pulled in different directions. All of my kids have very different needs and it is hard to find activities that cater to all three of them. Matthew needs one thing from me, Koyle needs another, Landon is sick of being tagged along, my housework is always there, and of course my husband, and my calling, and preschool, and.....
Especially now that preschool is over I feel like I am having to relearn how to organize and prioritize my time. We had a system down and now it is out the window. I am struggling to know what is the right balance between giving my kids enough time and attention, and giving them too much time at the sacrifice of my self and my other responsibilities. But they just beg for my attention all day and I am all too aware of how fast they grow up. I don't want to regret not taking these precious opportunities I have with them.
   But it seems like no matter how much I give it is never enough. I know there is a point where too much is not a good thing but I can't always clearly see when that is. And if you ask them to do anything, all heck breaks loose. Accomplishing anything is a constant battle. "Teach them correct principles while they are young" the voice in my head keeps telling me. "Give me the strength to keep with it" I plead. Matthew has one job each day-the dishwasher. You would think I asked him saw his own leg off. But I keep making him do it.
  That's not really what I intended to discuss today though. Back to life with three kids. Life is noisy now-all the time. It's amazing how taking one kid out of the mix makes such a difference. It doesn't matter which one; anytime I am left with only 2 of the kids life suddenly seems so easy and calm again. But at the same time there is more joy and more love; the deep, true, abiding kind of joy and love. I lose my patience too often and more times than not I ask myself if I can really handle having another child. But then I go in at night and check on them after they are asleep and my heart melts and I know I could do it over and over again.
   Out of necessity I have adopted a strict easy going, simple is best, don't stress the small stuff mentality. Sometimes we eat breakfast for dinner...a lot. Sometimes that last load of laundry never gets folded until laundry day rolls around again. And mostly I just don't care. This is it. This is life. This is what it looks like to raise a family. My family. Nobody else's family, just mine. I learn from trial and error, and try to seek wisdom from sources I trust.
 In short, how is it with three? It's crazy folks. We are a big, loud, bunch of crazy. But this is what we want, we believe with every fiber of our being that the family, our family, is ordained of God. It is central to His plan. More importantly, it becomes more and more clear each day that my family is central to His plan for me. This is how He is teaching me and perfecting me. He must feel the way I do as a parent: "How many times have I said it? Is it really that hard to just do it?" But He knows that I am worth it. And I know that my boys are worth it. And if we keep trying, together we will figure it out eventually.