Sunny with a chance of Thunder

You know those times when you feel like you are treading water? Keeping your head above water but not really going anywhere? That's where I have been; both in my role as a mother and on a personal level. I have known for a few weeks it was time to seek help, but I hadn't decided what kind of help. Read my scriptures more? Yes, I always need to do that. Find a parenting book from the library? Or maybe focus less on parenting and more on myself? Maybe I need an anger management book from the library? Or a magic potty training wand? That's it! A magic potty training wand is what I need.
   For quite some time I have known that the Church had a manual on teaching your kids about intimacy. Especially lately I have intended to look it up and read it. But there's always so many things to read.

**Aside: My mom always has a stack of books on her night stand that she is reading. I could never understand how or why. I prefer to choose one book and read it through and then move on to the next. But I think I get it now. Sometimes you just have to start things or they will never happen. So its okay to be reading a book for book club, a book to help me with my kids, and a book to educate me about something I'm interested in. In life there are different things that need focused on simultaneously. Now all I need is a night stand to pile all my books on!**

Then somebody posted on facebook a link to this Church handbook so conveniently I clicked on it and started reading. OH MY GOODNESS!! Where has this been my whole life? Seriously, folks it is that good. If you have children you should read it: https://www.lds.org/manual/a-parents-guide?lang=eng
This was EXACTLY what I have been looking for and needing in my life right now. (Funny how the Church has a way of providing exactly what you need.) The first two chapters are just basic parenting principles and then from there it goes into specifics of intimacy. I am still working my way through the second chapter so I'm sure there is much more goodness to come. I won't overload you with all the things that have inspired me; I will let you read it for yourself. But I will share just a couple big things that have stood out to me:

• The overall message is of course, keep an eternal perspective. Nothing new but such a good reminder. The task of teaching children and raising them right can seem so daunting and it is easy to see all the many behaviors you would like to change in your children and areas that need improvement. As a mother it is hard to decide which thing I should focus on, and when, and how intense. What things are age appropriate and what things really need to be addressed? And why can't my children just learn to use the potty like other children? But none of that really matters. It's not the little things that matter its the big things. Am I focused enough on the big things? Am I teaching my children who Christ is, and I mean WHO HE REALLY IS? Do they understand their place in God's plan? "Everything you do in your family here on earth should prepare you and your children to be like our Heavenly Father and to live in and lead eternal families." Keeping an eternal perspective gives me clarity to know what is important and what is not. It gives me hope that I am on the right track, and reminds me that I am not doing it alone. It also gives me the motivation to do better and be better because despite what Satan tells me, it really does matter. I need the Spirit to be in my home and he can't be when there is constant contention.
• "The emotional climate in the home establishes either a positive or a negative learning environment. Climate means 'the weather you can expect in a certain place.' What is the 'weather' in your home?" This struck me so powerfully. If I had to give a forecast of our home I would say sunny with a chance of thunder. We have a lot of joy and a lot of love and a lot of fun at our house. But at any moment there is a chance of thunder. The thunder being me. There have been many things surrounding this topic lately and I know the Lord is telling me that the time is right now to end this weakness. Oh how I pray that the Lord will turn this into my strength (Ether 12: 27 https://www.lds.org/scriptures/bofm/ether/12.27?lang=eng#26)  Having an eternal perspective helps me to see that the things I have been getting angry about are so silly. They don't even matter, they are dumb, petty, and childish. And all I am doing is destroying the climate of peace and love and trust in my home that my children so desperately need and want. So today I determined not to get angry. Day 1 success! 

And in the spirit of letting it go and keeping things in perspective, I took this video clip of how dinner went tonight. And I wouldn't have it any other way. Seeing Koyle's face light up is eternally better than crying over spilled milk. "Wickedness never was happiness" (Alma 41:10)

*I couldn't include the good videos of the boys being really excited because alas, they were not appropriate for public viewing. My magic potty training wand is naked time : )