A Labor of Love

Landon's labor was exactly what I expected in some ways, and so totally different in other ways. (If you want the short version skip down below to where it says The Short Story)

Day 1

It started Saturday night when I was not feeling super great. I just laid low and tried to get some rest. That night was one of my worst nights of sleep ever. I could not get comfortable and I had horrid heartburn, despite multiple servings of Tums. I woke up Sunday morning and did not feel good at all. I was groggy and tired from not sleeping, but I  also felt really  nauseous and had zero appetite. But I pulled myself together and got ready for church. About the time we headed out the door I had a few contractions (this was a 8:45 a.m.). The contractions kept happening and so I timed them all through sacrament meeting and they were 6-7 min apart. "This is it!" I thought. Flu like symptoms + contractions =labor. I never have consistent contractions randomly so I was pretty sure I would be having a baby that afternoon. I didn't want to announce it to the world at church though so I just acted like everything was normal. A couple people asked, "How much longer?" And I smiled and said something like, "Oh, anytime now hopefully!" Oh the irony. I wanted to walk around during Sunday school but we were having one of our classic Lubbock wind storms (which ended up lasting 3 full days) so I settled on sitting in the car with Justin, timing contractions, and talking. I still wasn't feeling any urgency and the contractions were still 6-7 min. apart so I went to Relief Society. By the time we got home and ate lunch I was feeling extremely tired. So I packed my hospital bag and laid down to take a nap and told Justin to wake me up in 30 min. and then I would start walking or doing lunges or something to help really get things moving. I was still having contractions after my nap and decided to take a hot bath. Then I started walking around the house, getting some things done, and trying to be more active. About this time (2:30) my contractions started to hover around 3 min apart. Justin did a little cleaning around the house, I got the boys a little bag packed, we got a hold of the babysitter and told her to stand by...but nothing happened. The contractions kept coming but they weren't getting any harder or more painful, they just kept happening. A little weird I thought, but okay. At 4:30 we texted Dr. Yoemens to update him on what was happening because he had said he didn't want me to labor at home for too long before I came in. I was feeling super tired again and laid down for another nap. About the time I woke up Dr. Yoemens got back to us and said he wanted me to come in and he would check me. (He was on call at the hospital so he was already there anyway). So we took the kids over to Abby and headed to the hospital. I knew I wasn't going to be staying (but there was always the off chance I would be) but I was glad to know if anything was actually happening or if this was just a fluke false labor thing. They checked me about 6:30 and I was at a 2 and 70% effaced and my cervix still hadn't tilted down the right direction. It was nice to know I wasn't crazy and that my body really was starting the process, but as I already knew it wasn't time to stay and have a baby yet. Dr. Y suspected he would be seeing me back before morning. So we picked up the kids, ate dinner (I hadn't eaten much all day and was finally feeling hungry), put the kids to bed, made sure my night on-call friend knew what was going on, and headed to bed. I better get some sleep while I can I figured. And sleep I did. I had the best night sleep ever. Not a single contraction all night. Bummer.

Day 2

Monday I woke up feeling okay and not having contractions. So Justin headed off to school to study for his test that afternoon. I was determined to have a normal day and not dwell on when the baby would really come. I wasn't feeling  nauseous like I had the day before but I was feeling gassy and crampy. I did clean out my bowels and then was feeling a lot better but the cramps didn't seem to be going away. I did the dishes and cleaned the guest bathroom working on my to do list. Finally I sat down to read some more about true vs. false labor. "Many people describe contractions as strong menstrual cramps" I read. Yep-that was me. That was not how my contractions had been with the other boys but clearly this labor was not going to go down like the others. I sent Justin an e-mail letting him know that I was having contractions and joking that maybe I would have this baby at home  because I clearly had no idea what was going on. I felt like a first time mom again trying to figure out what was happening. About noon I started timing my contractions because Justin had a test at 1 and I kind of needed to know how consistent they were being. They were all over the place-no consistency at all. But they kept coming and they were painful and annoying. After Justin's test we went ran a few errands to finish up the to do list and to walk a little. My sweet friend Brittany made us dinner that night. By evening I was feeling a little frustrated. Not so much because I hadn't had the baby yet; I really didn't care if the baby didn't come for a few more days. But I could not keep having contractions like this indefinitely. Two solid days of contractions and being in a state of limbo was starting to wear on me. I decided to take another hot bath. It felt sooo good. Now I know why women like to deliver in water. It really did relieve the pain of the contractions and I was able to really relax for a little while. I told Justin though that I didn't want to call people again tonight and have them on call and get myself all ready just to have another peaceful night's sleep. I kept timing my contractions on and off through the evening and they weren't getting really close together or more consistent. But they did seem to be getting more painful. (So more confusion about what my body was doing.)

The short story

By 8 o'clock my contractions were getting uncomfortable enough that I decided I should take them seriously. I also started feeling some anxiousness or urgency about life. I told Justin I wanted to put the boys to bed and start timing my contractions. We hurried through the bedtime routine (and by we I mean mostly Justin and I paced around) and got the boys to sleep. Sometime between 8:30-8:45 I was certain that it was time and this was really happening. The pain was increasing and I was having to breathe and focus and move through the contractions. (Leaning over onto the bed or table and swaying my hips back and forth felt the best). I called my dear friend Stephanie and asked if she could come over and sleep at my house. Oh, and could she come now? Just as I started wondering how long it would take her to get there (things were definitely moving along) she knocked on the door. I spouted off some instructions while pacing and walking around trying to seen normal but probably failing miserably. I walked through one more contraction in the drive way and then got in the car. I hate contractions in the car-you have to just sit there and you can't do anything to distract yourself. It made me dread getting to the hospital and being confined to a bed. But get there we did. Dr. Yoemens got there about the same time. I felt so bad; he had just finished a 36 hour shift at the hospital and had been asleep for about 20 minutes when I called him back in to the hospital. I kept reassuring him that I wouldn't keep him long; I even promised him cookies at one point during my labor. Anyways, they finally took me back to triage and I was at a 5, 100% effaced, and my cervix was in the right position-I could stay! But I already knew that.
They got me back to my delivery room and I was in a comfortable spot sitting on the edge of the bed and didn't want to move. They told me if I wanted to wait a little before getting my IV put in and breaking my water I could. I was torn because I knew that breaking my water would mean it would shortly be over, but I also knew what was coming once they broke my water. So I waited through a few more contractions and then decided it was time. My IV hurt super bad going in and then Dr. Yoemens came in to break my water about 10:20 and I was at a 7. That next contraction was intense! There was an immediate change in my contractions and it was at this point I wanted to back out. But my awesome doula Cara and my super supportive husband kept the positive talk coming and kept me going and focused. I was really focusing on keeping my body calm during contractions. Instead of clenching Justin's hand and tensing up I tried to move my arms in big fluid motions that mimicked my breathing; I probably looked funny but it was really effective. It wasn't long before it was time to push. Justin and my doula had been telling me when my contractions were peaking and starting to come down, etc. They told me that my contraction was coming down, almost over, okay it was done....but the pain did not go away for me. I kept saying over and over, "It's not going away, it's not going away,why isn't it going away?" That's when I knew it was time to push. They called the doctor right in and we started pushing. Those first few pushes felt so good-an outlet for the energy and the end was in sight. But then I had 3 or 4 super hard contractions right in a row with no time to relax or regain my focus and I lost it. My "pushes" were basically me screaming. It was weird because in my head I was telling myself not to scream and I was kind of embarrassed by it but there was no stopping it. I even remember yelling, "I'm not a screamer." Haha. But then I had a moment between contractions and I was able to take a deep breath and regain my composure and I did much better after that-no more screaming. Dr. Yoemens was massaging and trying to make sure I didn't tear, and he kept telling me to just do lots of small pushes, nice and little. But there was no holding me back. I was not going to go slow or easy. I was going to push as much as I wanted and as hard as I wanted. It took longer to push baby out than I expected. With Matthew I only had to push like 3 times. That being said I probably only pushed for 5 minutes. Right as I started pushing my doula asked me if I still wanted the mirror and I was indecisive so she didn't bring it over. Halfway in though I really wanted to be able to see. I wasn't sure how I would like watching but I really loved it! Not only was it neat to see and watch but it gave me a ton of focus because I could see exactly what was going on and what kind of progress I was making. I hate being in the blind and not knowing what is happening down there so I loved having the mirror. I just wish I had watched the whole thing though. Once that head started out on my final push I closed my eyes (I close my eyes a lot during labor and especially when in the moment of pushing). And then I didn't look back at the mirror to actually watch the baby come out. I'm not sure why-it didn't even cross my mind until much later that I hadn't seen him actually be born. Next time! But baby was born at 11:11 on Monday night. 

After Delivery

They put the baby right up on me which is the first time I have ever been able to hold my baby immediately after delivery. I loved it. That was the one thing I really wanted with this delivery and I got it! They wiped him off a little on me and then we did skin to skin. It was so great to have his warm little body on mine. I tore to a 2nd degree so they stitched me all up (which hurt more this time and took longer than I remember) but I'm sure it was the same. I got to hold him for a long time. At one point we realized that Landon had pooped all over me-welcome to motherhood! So they cleaned us up and got us a clean sheet, but he pooped on us again before it was over! He pooped about 4 times in the first two hours he was born, and about 10 times in the first day! I loved that the hospital did everything in our room and baby hardly ever had to leave, and we had a little control over when things happened. It was kind of hard to wait for them to weigh and measure him because I really wanted to know how big he was. Landon is an awesome eater and he latched right on with no troubles (both sides, which is a big deal for me). When they tested his blood sugar though it was a little low and so they made me nurse him again and he ate for a long time. His blood sugar popped right up and stayed up after that. He had a bit of a hard time keeping his body temperature up and they won't do the bath until baby is maintaining a certain temp. It ended up working out good though because we waited until the boys came to give him his bath. They did it right in our room and so the boys got to watch and even help wipe him down. It was the first time I ever saw my baby's first bath! 

That first night he was super stuffy and had a lot of fluid in his system. It sounded like he was really struggling to breathe. They sucked out his throat a few times but it kept making me really nervous. Twice I made them test his oxygen levels to make sure he was okay. That night Justin held him upright on his lap until he cleared out and started breathing better. He hasn't had any problems since then.

Meeting brother for the first time. The boys LOVE him!

Going home

My first outfit

Our first family photo

 Our dear friends Brad & Brittany were our only hospital visitors; a change from our other babies when we had lots of family and friends around. Brittany came when we brought the boys up for the first time and took lots of awesome pictures for us. She also made me dinner, watched my kids....we owe her a ton!